Monday, September 24, 2012

Hi... How much do you weigh?

I'm moving to Cambodia on Thursday. Holy smokes! I'm going to volunteer for an aid org which basically makes me one of the single greatest and most enormously selfless people you've ever had the great fortune to read a blog by - yes, please feel free to applaud. I honestly can't wait. I've needed a challenge in my life for so, so long that I'm desperate for a new scene. I figure moving to a new country, working in a rural area, not knowing a word of Khmer and leaving my boyfriend, family and gorgeous friends is INDEED a challenge.

From what I understand though, cambodia isn't that tough a place to be in... Beautiful people, amazing scenery, a mix of fascinating history including years of pain and genocide. It will be amazing but I'm aware of one thing - in going to Cambooge, I'm going to expose myself to the very blunt scrutiny of the locals who will not hesitate to start a conversation with "you're so faaaaat!". Daily. No, scratch that, it will happen every five minutes. I remember this from living in Hong Kong and it only got more invasive when people realised I was not only fat but had a black boyfriend!! One of the current volunteers has emailed me to say most conversations with her work colleagues begin with them asking how much she weighs... Hmmmm. So do I lie? That's the question. Obviously it's just a number (the logical part of my brain says) and it may not mean much to whoever is asking me, but frankly, I don't want to keep saying it. I mean, it's not just a number to me! It's a large part of what I feel worst about. It would have been nice to escape it for a while... I guess all I can hope is that I get enough food poisoning that the number reduces? Or there's enough personal growth that I grow to genuinely not care.

Speak to u soon from PP.

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